communication Archives | Grow Strong Leaders https://growstrongleaders.com/tag/communication/ Leadership Development That Works Mon, 13 Oct 2025 18:01:19 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=7.1.1 https://growstrongleaders.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/10/cropped-GSL-Gold-Coin-512x512-1-32x32.png communication Archives | Grow Strong Leaders https://growstrongleaders.com/tag/communication/ 32 32 348: Transforming from Manager to True Leader https://growstrongleaders.com/mark-hinderliter-phd/ Mon, 13 Oct 2025 17:49:03 +0000 https://growstrongleaders.com/?p=14138 The post 348: Transforming from Manager to True Leader appeared first on Grow Strong Leaders.

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348: Transforming from Manager to True Leader

 

What’s the real difference between managing and leading? Mark Hinderliter, former C-suite executive, business owner, and consultant, explains how shifting from managing processes to inspiring people can transform both your leadership and your organization. Drawing from his book From Manager to Leader: 6 Practices that Accelerate Transformation and his own journey, he shares practical lessons on growing through mistakes and focusing on what matters most.

You’ll also hear why trust is the foundation of strong teams and how leaders can show character, competence, connection, and consistency. Mark shares practical insights on balancing accountability with support, giving clear feedback, and creating clarity through active listening. His stories and strategies will help you reflect on your own leadership and take steps to strengthen both relationships and results.

Mark is the creator of Diamond Quality Leadership©, a workshop designed to help managers lead today’s workforce. As a senior leader in the corporate arena, Mark has taught and coached hundreds of leaders at all levels in eight countries. In his own business, Mark has coached leaders from the Director level up to the CEO.

You’ll discover:

  • The key distinction between managing tasks and leading people
  • How trust impacts culture, engagement, and performance
  • Why accountability is a vital part of servant leadership
  • Ways to improve clarity in giving feedback and instructions
  • Six practices that accelerate your growth as a leader

Watch the episode:

 

Connect with Mark

Mark’s Resources

Website

Third Way Inc.

Book

From Manager to Leader: Six Practices that Accelerate Transformation

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Leader-team communication and character skills

Grow Strong Character

Dennis E. Coates, Ph.D.

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Connect with Your Team Book - Grow Strong Leaders

Connect with Your Team

Dennis E. Coates, Ph.D.,
and Meredith M. Bell
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Connect with Your Team Book - Grow Strong Leaders

Peer Coaching Made Simple

Dennis E. Coates, Ph.D.,
and Meredith M. Bell

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]]> 342: The Group Intervention That Transformed a Team https://growstrongleaders.com/meredith-bell-10/ Tue, 02 Sep 2025 15:17:51 +0000 https://growstrongleaders.com/?p=14085 The post 342: The Group Intervention That Transformed a Team appeared first on Grow Strong Leaders.

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342: The Group Intervention That Transformed a Team

What do you do when one person’s behavior is quietly eroding the trust and teamwork of your group—and no one wants to speak up? In this episode, I share a true story from my own leadership journey where I faced that exact challenge. You’ll hear how I guided four frustrated team members through a structured, respectful process to share their concerns directly with a colleague—and how that meeting became one of the most transformative moments of my career.

You’ll discover the simple 4-step feedback model we used, why it’s so effective in preventing defensiveness, and how it can turn even the most difficult conversations into opportunities for connection. You’ll also hear an unexpected twist that shifted the entire dynamic in the room and led to deeper trust, openness, and collaboration than the team had ever experienced before.

I’m the co-founder and president of Grow Strong Leaders. We’ve created online resources that help leaders strengthen their character and communication skills to build strong relationships and inspire others to perform at the highest level. ​

You’ll discover:

  • Why waiting too long to address an issue can backfire
  • A 4-step framework for giving feedback with clarity and care
  • How to prepare people so emotions don’t derail the message
  • The surprising moment that turned confrontation into connection

Watch the episode:

Connect with Meredith

          

Meredith’s Resources

Website

Grow Strong Leaders

Books

Connect with Your Team: Mastering the Top 10 Communication Skills

Grow Strong Character

Related Podcast Episodes

176: How Michelin’s ICARE Model Creates Open Communication

 

 

Listen to the Grow Strong Leaders Podcast on YouTube
Listen to the Grow Strong Leaders Podcast on Apple Podcasts
Listen to the Grow Strong Leaders Podcast on Pandora
Listen to the Grow Strong Leaders Podcast on Spotify
Listen to the Grow Strong Leaders Podcast on Amazon
Listen to the Grow Strong Leaders Podcast on iheartradio

Connect with Your Team

Mastering the Top 10 Communication Skills

Order from Amazon

Peer Coaching Made Simple

How to Do the 6 Things That Matter Most When Helping Someone Improve a Skill

Order from Amazon

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]]> Lift People Up with Constructive Feedback https://growstrongleaders.com/lift-people-up-with-constructive-feedback/ Thu, 21 Aug 2025 16:45:32 +0000 https://growstrongleaders.com/?p=14036 The post Lift People Up with Constructive Feedback appeared first on Grow Strong Leaders.

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LIFT PEOPLE UP WITH CONSTRUCTIVE FEEDBACK

By Dr. Denny Coates

Have you ever noticed someone doing something ineffective, unauthorized, inconsiderate, dangerous, or even illegal? Maybe you felt the urge to confront them. Maybe you were so surprised and upset that you reacted emotionally, expressing your dismay with a harsh comment. In other words, with criticism, instead of constructive feedback.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

“Why did you do that?”

“That wasn’t very smart….”

“I’ve told you I don’t know how many times…?” 

Nobody Is Perfect

While it’s perfectly natural to get upset with behavior that disappoints or offends you, people react badly to criticism. Sometimes a person has good intentions but has forgotten what is expected or is so distracted that they make a mistake. No one is perfect. Also, criticism fails to acknowledge the possibility that the person you’re trying to correct may well “get it right” most of the time. So it’s human nature for the recipient to resent the implication that they are inadequate or flawed in some way. This is why criticism is usually perceived as a personal attack rather than helpful input.

And yet, pointing out problem behavior is almost always the responsible thing to do.

Begin and conclude your feedback with positives. This is what makes feedback constructive.

What’s needed is a way to communicate the kind of feedback that inspires someone to do their best. Because it purposefully reinforces the other person’s strengths, this approach is called constructive feedback. It goes like this:

  • Pause before reacting: “When you feel upset and want to criticize, take two deep breaths. That short pause helps you respond calmly so the other person stays open to hearing you.”
  • Lead with a positive: “I’ve noticed how effective you are when speaking with our clients. That confidence builds trust and makes them eager to work with us.”
  •  Describe the problem behavior: “This morning I overheard you explaining our onboarding process. Instead of describing how we do it, you focused on the problems with other approaches, which could leave clients unsure about our own value.”
  •  Conclude with the consequence: “When negatives are emphasized, customers may feel confused or even doubtful. Clear, positive explanations keep their confidence strong.”
  •  Respond with listening: If the person reacts strongly to your feedback, take time to listen and understand their perspective. This shows respect and often helps them accept your input more fully.
  •  State the behavior you want: “I’ve seen you get excellent results when you spotlight our innovative approach. When you do that, customers quickly see the advantages of choosing us.”
  •  Finish with encouragement: “Yesterday I heard you highlight how our onboarding process saves clients time, and you explained it with real enthusiasm. When you focus on our strengths, customers feel confident they made the right choice with us.”

The "Feedback Sandwich"

The idea is to begin and conclude your feedback with positives. This is what makes feedback constructive. With practice, constructive feedback will become your go-to alternative to criticism.

You can learn more about listening to understand and constructive feedback —two very powerful skills described in the how-to book, Connect with Your Team: Mastering the Top 10 Communication Skills.

Connect with Your Team

Mastering the Top 10 Communication Skills

Dennis E. Coates, Ph.D.,  and Meredith M. Bell

Order from Amazon

The post Lift People Up with Constructive Feedback appeared first on Grow Strong Leaders.

]]> Honesty: So People Will Believe What You Tell Them https://growstrongleaders.com/honesty/ Wed, 02 Jul 2025 20:23:50 +0000 https://growstrongleaders.com/?p=13898 The post Honesty: So People Will Believe What You Tell Them appeared first on Grow Strong Leaders.

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Honesty: So People Will Believe What You Tell Them

By Dr. Denny Coates

A friend once shared stories with me about her time as a young commercial banker in New Orleans during the 1980s. Many of the stories were about honesty. Oil prices had fallen drastically, so her client portfolio consisted mostly of “work-out projects”—finding ways to help businesses repay loans before they defaulted. It was a stressful time.

She worked for a small community bank run by the founder. When she took over the portfolio, she reviewed the loans and discovered one that should never have been made in the first place. Her recommendation was to downgrade the loan, require additional sources of repayment, and establish a repayment timetable. She provided the chairman with a list of actions required to qualify the loan for renewal.

When he told her to renew it as it was, she stood her ground. Otherwise, she’d have to tell the committee that the loan was acceptable as it stood, which wasn’t true.

The chairman was upset and renewed the loan anyway. Several months later, a team of bank examiners questioned her about the loan. They told her the chairman said she was the one who approved it. She was outraged and produced her copy of the list of requirements she had given to him.

A few weeks later, he was fired. 

Make truth your foundation, and the edifice you build on it will last.

Engagement Ring

Back then, my friend was single. She told me she dated an attractive, intelligent young man who shared many of her interests, such as photography and running. The relationship looked promising.

One day, he was showing her a stack of recent photos he’d taken. At the bottom of the stack was a picture of a woman’s hands holding an engagement ring. She asked about the ring and the woman holding it. Looking at the floor, he said, “It’s my fiancé.”

My friend realized that she had been told a half-truth, which is just as insidious as a lie. “Why didn’t you tell me you were engaged?” He mumbled his excuses, and she realized he had a serious character flaw and couldn’t be trusted. The relationship was over.

“A half-truth is a whole lie.” – Jewish Proverb

Every time you open your mouth, you have an opportunity to either provide true, accurate information or misrepresent the truth in some way. You could leave out an embarrassing fact, make the truth seem better than it really is, or say things that aren’t true in hopes that the fabrication will give you a better chance of getting what you want.

But…

My wife once asked me, “Wasn’t that the best coconut cake you ever had in your life?”

Well now. Was it? Actually, I had eaten a piece of coconut cake a few months earlier, and it was pretty awesome. Was this better? Maybe it was. Maybe it wasn’t. But I knew what I should say.

“This is quite definitely the best coconut cake I’ve ever had,” I said.

You see, my wife wasn’t asking for the truth. She was asking for praise. She had worked hard to make this cake special, so I told her what she wanted to hear. And my spirit was right. I loved the cake. It was wonderful.

What is honesty?

Honesty means being truthful, sincere, frank, and candid in your words. It means being transparent and genuine. You present information, thoughts, and feelings accurately and without deception, even when the truth is embarrassing, unpopular, or prevents you from enjoying the benefit you desire. Honesty is the opposite of lying or any form of misleading communication.

Why is honesty important?

Dishonesty does damage. And you are the first to be damaged. You lose self-esteem every time you tell a lie. It’s automatic. You know you lied. You know you’re a person who tells lies. The people you lie to will be hurt if they make commitments based on the false information. If you tell a lie, you have to maintain it. You have tell follow-up lies to support your story. You have to remember these lies, too, which is terribly difficult, People eventually learn the truth.

All relationships are based on trust. Honesty is crucial to strong leadership, teamwork, or any meaningful relationship. People learn to trust you when they believe what you say is true. Without the trust of the people around you, you have nothing. When they find out you’ve deceived them, they’ll stop trusting you. They’ll believe that if you lied once, you’ll probably do it again. It could take years to earn someone’s trust, but you’ll lose it in a single moment of betrayal. If people can’t trust you to be honest, they won’t trust you to act in their best interests, which could lead them to withdraw cooperation and engagement.

What you can do to strengthen your honesty

  • When someone asks you a question, give an accurate answer, even if it makes you feel uncomfortable.
  • When you’ve made a mistake or acted inappropriately, admit it and take responsibility.
  • When you share your thoughts, feelings, or concerns, be open and sincere.
  • Be honest with yourself. Admit the truth about your strengths, weaknesses, thoughts, feelings, desires, and motivations.
  • When you say or do something you’d like to take back, tell the truth about your mistake.
  • Recognize that no one expects you to be perfect and that most people appreciate candor. Admit your error without worrying about being embarrassed

Like any skill, honesty is a behavior pattern. Choose honesty consistently, and it will get stronger over time. Partner with someone you trust to be honest with you and coach you with encouragement so you stick with it.

Learn more about honesty and dozens of other character-related behavior patterns in Grow Strong Character, which is one of the key resources in the leader development system, Grow Strong Leaders. Check out other character strengths related to honesty: integrity, compassion, self-esteem, courage, and cooperation.

Leader-team communication and character skills

Grow Strong Character

Dennis E. Coates, Ph.D.

Order from Amazon

Related Posts

330: Coaching Character as the Foundation of Leadership

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]]> Say Nothing – A Power Skill https://growstrongleaders.com/saying-nothing-a-power-skill/ Wed, 25 Jun 2025 19:13:26 +0000 https://growstrongleaders.com/?p=13825 The post Say Nothing – A Power Skill appeared first on Grow Strong Leaders.

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SAYING NOTHING – A POWER SKILL

By Dr. Denny Coates

Both my sons are in their 50s, still pursuing highly successful careers in information technology. I check in with them often, and when I do, I make an effort to communicate effectively. I try to be aware of moments when a particular skill will work best for me—as I do with friends, other family members, and business associates. During a recent conversation, I was reminded of something important. Often, the best response is to not respond—saying nothing. There were moments when I felt the urge to give advice, to debate, or to give feedback. But instead, I just let him do the talking.

 

“In the heat of the moment, choose your battles. Sometimes saying nothing is the smartest thing you can do.”

It worked like a charm; it was the most effective thing I could have done. No argument. No implication of criticism. Nothing to push us apart. Just a nonverbal signal that I was thinking about what my son had said.

Saying nothing is a powerful, underappreciated skill.

Instead of reacting, just listen, and let them know nonverbally that you’re hearing and considering what they have to say.

And if you feel you really must say something, ask an open-ended question. Instead of saying, “That doesn’t sound like a good idea,” say “What do you think will happen if you do that?” And then follow up with listening to understand, or a follow-up question, such as “If that happens, how would you feel about that?” But let saying nothing be your lead.

Learn more about listening and asking open-ended questions in Chapters 4 and 5 of Connect with Your Team.

Connect with Your Team Book - Grow Strong Leaders

Connect with Your Team

Dennis E. Coates, Ph.D.,
and Meredith M. Bell
Order from Amazon

Related Posts

122: Making the Most of Your Moments

Would You Rather Argue or Have a DIALOGUE?

 

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]]> 264: Leading Young Adults and Junior Professionals https://growstrongleaders.com/ariana-tadler/ Tue, 20 Feb 2024 17:36:23 +0000 https://growstrongleaders.com/?p=9767 The post 264: Leading Young Adults and Junior Professionals appeared first on Grow Strong Leaders.

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264: Leading Young Adults and Junior Professionals

Often leaders struggle with the best way to develop members of the younger generation entering the workforce. You’ll get great ideas and practical tips for Ariana Tadler in this high-energy conversation. Helping young adults create a successful career is a deep passion project for Ariana, based on her experience as an attorney, business owner, mentor, and mother.

You’ll want to take notes because Ariana drops lots of gems that can guide you in strengthening your relationship with the younger members of your team. Her vulnerability, openness, and curiosity as a leader have helped her build a strong team in her own firm.

Ariana is the founding partner of Tadler Law LLP, a women-owned boutique law firm that offers an array of litigation and legal counseling services. Ariana is one of the leading women litigators in the country. She has 30 years’ experience advocating for consumers and investors against corporate fraud and abuse.

Ariana is recognized as one of the nation’s leading authorities on electronic discovery. She pioneered the establishment of an e-Discovery Practice group within a plaintiffs’ firm structure 20 years ago. She’s also a professional and keynote speaker.

You’ll discover:

  • The 3 core areas Ariana focuses on when mentoring young professionals
  • Why communicating effectively in the workplace is challenging for those in the 18-35 age group
  • How Ariana works with the young people in her firm
  • What she does to help everyone on her team have open, honest conversations
  • Actions Ariana takes to help young adults develop into strong leaders

Watch the episode:

Connect with Ariana

    

Ariana’s Website

Tadler Law LLP

Listen to the Grow Strong Leaders Podcast on YouTube
Listen to the Grow Strong Leaders Podcast on Apple Podcasts
Listen to the Grow Strong Leaders Podcast on Pandora
Listen to the Grow Strong Leaders Podcast on Spotify
Listen to the Grow Strong Leaders Podcast on Amazon
Listen to the Grow Strong Leaders Podcast on iheartradio

Connect with Your Team

Mastering the Top 10 Communication Skills

Order from Amazon

Peer Coaching Made Simple

How to Do the 6 Things That Matter Most When Helping Someone Improve a Skill

Order from Amazon

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]]> 216: Design a Long-Distance Team for Everyone’s Success https://growstrongleaders.com/kevin-eikenberry2/ Tue, 07 Mar 2023 14:23:59 +0000 https://growstrongleaders.com/?p=7861 The post 216: Design a Long-Distance Team for Everyone’s Success appeared first on Grow Strong Leaders.

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216: Design a Long-Distance Team for Everyone’s Success

Many companies are struggling with how to structure work, and some are requiring everyone to return to the physical building. Yet remote and hybrid teams are here to stay. Kevin Eikenberry shares practical tips from his new book, The Long-Distance Team, on making these teams successful.

Kevin is an expert on this subject, not only because he’s written the book, but also because he’s been leading a long-distance team himself for more than 25 years. He explains how to consciously design teams, define and create culture, and nurture employee engagement, all from a distance.

Kevin is the Chief Potential Officer of The Kevin Eikenberry Group.  He’s recognized by Inc.com as one of the top 100 Leadership and Management thinkers in the world. Kevin has spent nearly 30 years helping organizations around the world in the areas of leadership development, learning, teams and teamwork, and communication.

You’ll discover:

  • Why getting involvement from everyone is important when designing your team
  • A simple and clear definition of Culture
  • Differences in creating culture in a new team vs. an existing team
  • The 3 Cs that are the pillars for long-distance teams…and why they are essential
  • The distinction between expectations and agreements for both individuals and teams

Watch the episode:

Connect with Kevin

        

Kevin’s Resources

Website

The Kevin Eikenberry Group

Books

The Long-Distance Team: Designing Your Team for Everyone’s Success

The Long-Distance Teammate: Stay Engaged and Connected While Working Anywhere

The Long-Distance Leader: Rules for Remarkable Remote Leadership

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Connect with Your Team

Mastering the Top 10 Communication Skills

Order from Amazon

Peer Coaching Made Simple

How to Do the 6 Things That Matter Most When Helping Someone Improve a Skill

Order from Amazon

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]]> 168: Cracking the Leadership Code https://growstrongleaders.com/alain-hunkins/ Mon, 25 Jul 2022 13:18:14 +0000 https://growstrongleaders.com/?p=7283 The post 168: Cracking the Leadership Code appeared first on Grow Strong Leaders.

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168: Cracking the Leadership Code

Did you know that only 23% of people think their leaders lead well? How did we get to the point that employees have such low confidence in their leaders?

Alain Hunkins understands what people are looking for, and why the approach of previous generations of leaders is not the answer. He talks in a compelling way about the three C’s that are required—Connection, Communication, and Collaboration. They form the basis of his excellent book, Cracking the Leadership Code.

Alain is CEO of Hunkins Leadership Group, where he helps high achieving people become high achieving leaders.  Over his twenty-year career, Alain has worked with thousands of groups of leaders in 25 countries. Clients include Wal-Mart, Pfizer, General Electric, IBM, and Microsoft.

You’ll discover:

  • The impact on Alain of growing up with two Holocaust survivors (mother and grandmother)
  • What younger workers are looking for—but not getting—from most leaders
  • Why leading with empathy is essential…and the benefits of doing so
  • What gets in the way of leaders communicating well
  • How to identify and acknowledge peak moments to create a positive workplace

Watch the episode:

Connect with Alain

      

Alain’s Resources

Website

Alain Hunkins

Book

CRACKING THE LEADERSHIP CODE: Three Secrets to Building Strong Leaders

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Connect with Your Team

Mastering the Top 10 Communication Skills

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Peer Coaching Made Simple

How to Do the 6 Things That Matter Most When Helping Someone Improve a Skill

Order from Amazon
Subscribe to our YouTube channel!

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]]> 153: Be a Go-Giver in Marriage and Life https://growstrongleaders.com/john-ana-mann/ Tue, 17 May 2022 15:24:59 +0000 https://growstrongleaders.com/?p=7037 The post 153: Be a Go-Giver in Marriage and Life appeared first on Grow Strong Leaders.

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153: Be a Go-Giver in Marriage and Life

What if you could find out secrets to a strong marriage and then discover that these same secrets can apply to all your relationships? That’s exactly what you’ll learn in this profound conversation I had with John David Mann and Ana Gabriel Mann, co-authors of The Go-Giver Marriage.

John is coauthor of more than 30 books, including his classic 2008 parable The Go-Giver, coauthored with Bob Burg. Ana is a clinical psychologist and therapist currently focused on training coaches around the globe to lead The Go-Giver Marriage workshops.

You’ll discover:

  • The role John and Ana each played in the creation of this book
  • The one principle that underlies all 5 secrets
  • Specific words you can say to express appreciation
  • Which secret is a favorite for John and for Ana – and why
  • Why they refer to one’s partner as an “unexplored continent”

Watch the episode:

 

Connect with John

      

Connect with Ana

        

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Connect with Your Team

Mastering the Top 10 Communication Skills

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Peer Coaching Made Simple

How to Do the 6 Things That Matter Most When Helping Someone Improve a Skill

Order from Amazon

John & Ana’s Website

The Go Giver Marriage

John & Ana’s Book

The Go-Giver Marriage: A Little Story About the 5 Secrets to Lasting Love

Subscribe to our YouTube channel!

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