320: How Unresolved Wounds Affect the Way You Lead

320: How Unresolved Wounds Affect the Way You Lead

320: How Unresolved Wounds Affect the Way You Lead

 

Conflict is inevitable, but how leaders handle it makes all the difference. In this episode, vicki abadesco! shares a real-world example of a well-known organization struggling with team conflict and how small miscommunications can escalate when left unresolved. She explains how our upbringing shapes our approach to conflict and why developing emotional intelligence is essential for effective leadership. Through her work with both executives and young children, vicki highlights the importance of clear communication, emotional awareness, and accountability in building strong teams and relationships.

vicki also introduces practical tools like the “emotional balloon” and the “cleanup process” to help individuals recognize their emotions, take responsibility for their actions, and repair relationships when mistakes happen. Whether you’re leading a team, raising a family, or simply striving to communicate better, this episode will provide insights and strategies to help you lead with empathy, transparency, and authenticity.

vicki is a nonprofit leader and mentor renowned for her unwavering commitment to growth and lifelong learning. Through her organization, Soul Shoppe, she and her team have touched the hearts and minds of over one million elementary school students with their conflict resolution and peacemaking curriculum. vicki has created a lasting impact, nurturing a generation of emotionally intelligent individuals who can build strong relationships and foster inclusive communities.

You’ll discover:

  • Why conflict resolution is a critical leadership skill
  • How early life experiences shape communication habits
  • The “emotional balloon” metaphor for managing emotions
  • A 5-step process for acknowledging mistakes and making amends
  • How teaching emotional intelligence to kids can inspire better leadership in adults

Watch the episode:

Connect with vicki

      

vicki’s Website

Soul Shoppe

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Leader-team communication and character skills

Grow Strong Character

Dennis E. Coates, Ph.D.

Connect with Your Team Book - Grow Strong Leaders

Connect with Your Team

Dennis E. Coates, Ph.D.,
and Meredith M. Bell
Connect with Your Team Book - Grow Strong Leaders

Peer Coaching Made Simple

Dennis E. Coates, Ph.D.,
and Meredith M. Bell

147: How to Transform Conflict into Connection

147: How to Transform Conflict into Connection

147: How to Transform Conflict into Connection

What if you could welcome conflicts instead of avoiding or dreading them? My guest Jason Digges describes how it’s possible to do just that by using Authentic Relating. We talk about that topic and many other ideas from his excellent book, Conflict = Energy, The Transformative Practice of Authentic Relating. You will want to take notes because Jason shares a wealth of practical ideas you can apply at work and at home.

Jason is a modern renaissance man. He’s equal parts artist, philosopher, teacher, and media producer. From 2003-2012 he worked for Integral Institute to create thousands of hours of educational media on the topics of transpersonal psychology, spirituality, productivity, and personal growth. Jason is obsessed with how humans can live and relate optimally. Since 2012, he’s facilitated groups and taught authentic relating and circling courses in over 20 cities around the world.

You’ll discover:

  • The 5 practices involved in Authentic Relating (AR)
  • Why Appreciation is a key element in building trust and strong relationships
  • The roles of Noticing, Appreciating, and Curiosity in AR
  • Why Dignity + Humility = Transformation and how the shadow side of each can get in the way of connecting with others
  • How leaders can create psychological safety so people feel free to speak up and share their thoughts and feelings

Watch the episode:

Connect with Jason

    

Connect with Your Team

Mastering the Top 10 Communication Skills

Peer Coaching Made Simple

How to Do the 6 Things That Matter Most When Helping Someone Improve a Skill

121: Replace Drama with Compassionate Accountability

121: Replace Drama with Compassionate Accountability

121: Replace Drama with Compassionate Accountability

Want to reduce the amount of drama and conflict in your life? My guest Nate Regier explains the drama triangle and the real causes of conflict…and why compassionate accountability is the solution to both. Nate’s unique perspective about conflict can help you approach differences with another person in a new, better way. He’s brilliant in creating models that foster positive relationships and workplaces…and then teaching clients how to use them to transform their organizations. You’ll find that his model for compassionate accountability has immediate application in your life.

Nate is the CEO and founding owner of Next Element Consulting, a global leadership firm dedicated to bringing compassion into the workplace. He’s the author of three books, and this interview focused on his second book: Conflict without Casualties: A Field Guide for Leading with Compassionate Accountability. Nate hosts an excellent podcast called “On Compassion with Dr. Nate,” where he spotlights leaders committed to building positive cultures.

You’ll discover:

  • The dynamics between the 3 roles of Victim, Rescuer and Persecutor
  • Why Nate describes Rescuers as “non-consensual helpers”
  • What Nate means when he says, “Compassion is not for the faint of heart”
  • The 3 elements of the model (Open-Resourceful-Persistent-Order) and why the sequence is so important
  • The distinction between boundaries, ultimatums and consequences

Watch the episode:

Connect with Nate

        

Connect with Your Team

Mastering the Top 10 Communication Skills

Peer Coaching Made Simple

How to Do the 6 Things That Matter Most When Helping Someone Improve a Skill