The Power of Courage

The Power of Courage

The Power of Courage

By Dr. Denny Coates

In 1980, I researched Army training practices to write a manual for junior leaders on how to train soldiers. I traveled to various units to observe best practices. One of these was Special Forces training at the John F. Kennedy Special Warfare Center at Fort Bragg, NC, where I saw trainees who were challenged to display courage.

On the day I visited, they were being introduced to rappelling skills. About a dozen drill sergeants barked at the soldiers as they climbed the tower, learned how to tie a seat, and took their first descent over the edge. It was loud, chaotic, and stressful.

I decided I needed a closer look, so I climbed the tower myself. At the top, I witnessed young men struggling to maintain their composure under the pressure to perform and the fear of going over the side unassisted. I wondered if the stress created by the drill sergeants had a positive learning effect. I was jolted out of my musings by one of the sergeants who came up to me and said, “Well, Major, are you going to stand there and watch, or are you going over the side?”

With a challenge like that, how could I decline?

What he didn’t know was that I had mastered rappelling skills in the Army Ranger School. I had climbed 100-foot rock faces without safety ropes. I had rappelled down mountain cliffs numerous times.

So I quickly walked over, tied my seat, and went over the side. I negotiated the 30-foot distance in one leap, braking for a soft landing. I went to the bleachers and sat next to an old sergeant-major as I watched the trainees cope with their fear.

Soon, the session was over, and the sergeant-major invited me to stick around and watch the families of the cadre use the rappelling tower. This time, there was no shouting, only laughter and encouragement. It was just a bunch of women and kids having fun. I watched little ten-year-old girls playfully do what 20-year-old male Special Forces trainees struggled to do. The kids saw the rappelling tower as some super-cool jungle gym. They had no fear at all, so the rappelling activity was ridiculously easy. They climbed the tower over and over. They couldn’t get enough of it.

    Leap the great leap, and you’ll cross the chasm.

    The Power of Courage

    For me, this experience illustrated that fear arises from our perception of the situation, which can vary from person to person. The rappel was exactly the same challenge for both the soldiers and the kids, but the soldiers had to face their fears in order to do it. They risked failure, humiliation, disqualification, and, they thought, personal injury. For those who succeeded—and not all of them did—it was a big deal. The training gave them a victory of courage and self-confidence.

    The soldiers who successfully completed the many months of Special Forces training would later survive more challenges to their courage. In the end, they would become experts in dealing with fear—icons of mental toughness, ready for anything.

    A Test of Courage

    I’ve faced some interesting dangers in my life. In Vietnam, I was an advisor to Vietnamese infantry soldiers. This meant that I was involved in some kind of combat operation several times a week—airmobile assaults, search-and-destroy missions, night ambushes, and so forth.

    I came under fire more times than I can remember, but I don’t remember being afraid. For me, the main feeling was irritation. I was angry that someone was trying to kill us and that I would now have to deal with it.

    Mostly, I remember concentrating on managing all the activities related to close combat. I had to have a clear head to keep higher headquarters informed, assess the situation, communicate with my Vietnamese counterpart, direct movement and fire, deal with problems, request fire support or medical evacuation, and manage it when it arrived. Naturally, a person couldn’t do all that if he felt fear. If fear raised its ugly head, it had to be shoved aside. Lives depended on it.

    A Different Kind of Fear

    I remember being afraid one night in 2001. The economy had been in a recession after the stock market “tech bubble” burst. When it looked like the economy might recover, 9/11 happened, which caused confidence in the economy to tank even further. My business was to supply organizations with learning and development resources, and funds for tools like these were the first to be cut off. Our sales plummeted, with no hope in sight. I remember thinking that something dramatic was about to happen to my company. We might even go out of business. I imagined the scenarios, and yes, I felt real fear. But we focused on creative solutions, and wonderful things have happened for us since then.

    Downward trend - Cause for fear

    Fear is a healthy, natural emotion. It’s a whole-body alarm to help you sense danger so you can do what you need to do to avoid loss, harm, or death. The question is, when you’re threatened, what will you do next? Will you act to prevent loss, harm, or death? Will you take a chance to open a door of opportunity?

    I find Norman Vincent Peale’s words empowering: “Too much caution is bad for you. By avoiding things you fear, you may let yourself in for unhappy consequences. It is usually wiser to stand up to a scary-seeming experience and walk right into it, risking the bruises and hard knocks. You are likely to find it is not as tough as you had thought. Or you may find it plenty tough, but also discover you have what it takes to handle it.”

    What is courage?

    When you feel discomfort or fear in an unknown or dangerous situation, courage is about thinking before you react. When faced with a worrisome situation, it’s natural to feel anxiety or fear—your body’s instinctive response. By setting aside your instinctive reaction long enough to think before you act, you can evaluate your situation—the risks and rewards—to decide what you should do and take effective action.

    Why is courage important?

    While fear is a natural and useful reaction to danger, if it continues to dominate your response, you probably won’t be able to do what needs to be done. Instead of retreating to safety, success will come from setting fear aside so you can evaluate the situation, take prudent risks, and deal with it.

    Courage - Grow Strong Character

    What you can do to strengthen your courage

    • When faced with discrimination, oppression, or wrongdoing, take a stand for your principles by advocating for your rights and the rights of others.
    • Express and defend your beliefs in spite of opposition. Voice an unpopular opinion, advocate for a cause, and refuse to compromise your values.
    • Resist peer pressure to stay true to your personal values and principles.
    • Take calculated risks while starting a new project, pursuing a challenging career change, or embarking on an adventure outside your comfort zone.
    • Persist to overcome a personal fear or anxiety, such as a phobia.
    • Exercise courage when engaging in extreme sports or activities that require overcoming physical limitations.
    • Take bold action at work or in your life.
    • Speak your mind regardless of how it may be received.
    • When you notice people you know doing things that you don’t approve of, stand your ground. Don’t follow the herd.

    The idea in all these actions is to keep fear from becoming a paralyzing emotion. If you feel fear, pay attention to it, but then quickly put it aside long enough to assess the nature of the risk. What are the chances that bad things could happen? How bad? What are your choices? What are the risks and the benefits of these options? I recommend that you work with a coach to discuss your experiences and learn from them.

    Learn more about appreciation and dozens of other character-related behavior patterns in Grow Strong Character, which is one of the key resources in the leader development system, Grow Strong Leaders.

    Leader-team communication and character skills

    Grow Strong Character

    Dennis E. Coates, Ph.D.

    310: Moving Past Perfectionism

    310: Moving Past Perfectionism

    310: Moving Past Perfectionism

    Have you ever taken on a project that you thought would be straightforward…and then discovered it wasn’t?

    Sometimes that occurs because of the expectations we put on ourselves to perform at a certain level.

    That’s what happened to me when I tried to record a headshot video.

    In this solo episode I describe the situation, how I handled the setbacks, and what I learned from the experience that might be helpful for you, too.

    I’m the co-founder and president of Grow Strong Leaders. We’ve created online resources that help leaders strengthen their character and communication skills to build strong relationships and inspire others to perform at the highest level.

    You’ll discover:

    • The challenge I was given in a LinkedIn course
    • How I define perfectionism
    • Why I struggled initially to complete this assignment
    • What slowing down and reflecting helped me realize
    • 3 insights that allowed me to relax and enjoy the process

    Watch the episode:

    Connect with Meredith

            

    Listen to the GSL Podcast on YouTube
    Listen to the GSL Podcast on Apple Podcasts
    Listen to the GSL Podcast on Pandora
    Listen to the GSL Podcast on Spotify
    Listen to the GSL Podcast on Amazon
    Listen to the Grow Strong Leaders Podcast on iheartradio

    Connect with Your Team

    Mastering the Top 10 Communication Skills

    Peer Coaching Made Simple

    How to Do the 6 Things That Matter Most When Helping Someone Improve a Skill

    267: Becoming a Master of Change

    267: Becoming a Master of Change

    267: Becoming a Master of Change

    You can’t predict which career and life experiences will serve you in the future. Yet each one can prepare you for your next adventure if you become skillful in handling change. Terry Yoffe gives a masterclass in describing events from her early years and from her various jobs that helped prepare her to be an extraordinarily effective coach with her clients.

    Terry Yoffe is an Executive, Business and Career Coach. She has been coaching for over 20 years, after many years in both corporate and entrepreneurial roles. She brings an impressive breadth and depth of knowledge to her coaching and specializes in global business relations, which is critical to her work with international clients.

    Terry helps her clients maximize their talents and achieve their full potential. She employs a two-step process: having the client clarify their goals and then developing a focused strategic plan.

    Terry is also the host of the Extraordinary Work Podcast: Conversations about Creating Change.

    You’ll discover:

    • The varied experiences that prepared Terry for her coaching career
    • How she learned to deal with fear when stepping into the unknown
    • Tips for speaking up and advocating for yourself
    • What Terry does to guide clients to create changes in their lives

    Watch the episode:

    Connect with Terry

          

    Terry’s Resources

    Website

    TRY Coaching

    Podcast

    Extraordinary Work Podcast

    Listen to the GSL Podcast on YouTube
    Listen to the GSL Podcast on Apple Podcasts
    Listen to the GSL Podcast on Pandora
    Listen to the GSL Podcast on Spotify
    Listen to the GSL Podcast on Amazon
    Listen to the Grow Strong Leaders Podcast on iheartradio

    Connect with Your Team

    Mastering the Top 10 Communication Skills

    Peer Coaching Made Simple

    How to Do the 6 Things That Matter Most When Helping Someone Improve a Skill

    192: The Fearless Factor at Work

    192: The Fearless Factor at Work

    192: The Fearless Factor at Work

    What if you could change the way you look at fear? Jacqueline Wales has a deep understanding of what’s behind fear…and the questions you can ask yourself to break through limiting beliefs and stories that may be causing you to play small in life. You’ll discover how to reframe your ideas about fear and failure so they serve you instead of hold you back.

    Jacqueline developed a fearless approach herself after enduring, and then breaking away from, a nightmarish family to establish new patterns and find peace. She is now an author, keynote speaker, and trusted advisor to successful, high-achieving women. And she is an unwavering champion for being fearless.

    In this conversation we talk about key ideas and questions from her latest book, The Fearless Factor @ Work, which I highly recommend, especially if you’ve ever allowed your fears to get in the way of speaking up or taking courageous action.

    You’ll discover:

    • How Jacqueline defines fear and more specifically, fear in the workplace
    • The distinction Jacqueline makes between the stories we tell ourselves and the evidence for those beliefs
    • What she does to help clients play big when they’re used to playing small and holding back
    • Some of the messages that girls receive when growing up that don’t serve them as adults
    • The importance of self-compassion and self-love when you’re working to make a change

    Watch the episode:

     

    Connect with Jacqueline

      

    Connect with Your Team

    Mastering the Top 10 Communication Skills

    Peer Coaching Made Simple

    How to Do the 6 Things That Matter Most When Helping Someone Improve a Skill

    138: Become Calmer, More Mindful, and Less Overwhelmed

    138: Become Calmer, More Mindful, and Less Overwhelmed

    138: Become Calmer, More Mindful, and Less Overwhelmed

    Do you ever struggle with overwhelm and feel stressed? My guest Fran Keogh understands those feelings. She helps clients reduce those negative states by simplifying their decisions and their lives. Fran also “gets” the perfectionism and procrastination that keep someone from achieving the results they seek. In fact, her coaching practice focuses on assisting busy professionals to build a better life in order to have more time, fun, and freedom.

    Over the years, Fran has reinvented herself multiple times—from radio host, voice-over talent, “domestic goddess” (aka at-home mother of four), alpaca farmer, yoga teacher, health coach, to business life coach and speaker. This is a lively conversation with a very special human being who’s learned many lessons from her varied experiences.

     

    You’ll discover:

    • How Fran helps clients identify and work through overwhelm
    • What’s behind the fear that often drives us
    • How to practice mindfulness in your daily life
    • Why Fran does not hesitate to ASK for what she wants

    Watch the episode:

    Connect with Fran

        

    Connect with Your Team

    Mastering the Top 10 Communication Skills

    Peer Coaching Made Simple

    How to Do the 6 Things That Matter Most When Helping Someone Improve a Skill